Love is saying, I love you dear
I'm always right, you're always wrong
You spend too much, the money's gone
I may be mad, it may look sad
Daft, not all bad, 'cos aren't you glad
That I'm still here, I love you dear.
-ends-
Copyright Angela Lansbury 2023 April 2nd Sunday
Fifty Birthdays, comic poem 173
by Angela Lansbury
When you reach the age of one
Exploring the world is such fun
First, you step, then fall, then run
The age of one is ever such fun
When you reach the age of two
You find there's so much more to do
Each toy is exciting and new
When you reach the age of two
When you reach the age of three
You climb the cot and you run free
There's so much to explore and see
When you reach the age of three
When you reach the age of four
You run around exploring more
They'd better lock the big front door
When you reach the age of four
When you reach the age of five
It's so good to be alive
You've survived, so now you'll thrive
When you reach the age of five
When you reach the age of six
You pick up sticks, flail and fix
Build and break towers of bricks
When you reach the age of six
When you reach the age of 7
Off to school, parents' heaven
You wish that you could be eleven
When you reach the age of 7
When you reach the age of 8
You want to bake a little cake
How long can a bike ride take?
When you reach the age of 8
When you reach the age of 9
You're growing, but you're going fine
You've started stamps, found a fishing line
When you reach the age of nine
When you reach the age of 10
You'll soon mature, not sure when,
You need to grow, and count again
When you reach the age of ten
When you reach the age of 11
Too big for kids of 7
Big school looks just like heaven
When you reach the age of eleven
When you reach the age of 12
Start to study, dive and delve
Find things hidden on high shelves
When you reach the age of 12
When you reach the age of 13
Raise your eyebrows
Friends start flirting
When you reach the age of 13
When you reach age 14
Some big kids have started courting
Tut-tut, noughty-nought teen
When you reach age of 14
When you reach age 15
More selective, you start sifting
Seek your clique, your king and queen
When you reach age 15
When you reach sweet sixteen
In some places you could marry
Got exams so what's the hurry
When you reach sweet 16
When you reach the age of 17
You think you're a clever teen
But you are still in between
When you reach the age of 17
When you've got to age 18
In some States you can drink
Go to uni, start to think
Adult gaol's what eighteen means
When your birthday hits 19
You're a fine team on the screen
Football, six-pack, makes girls scream
When your birthday hits 19
At the tender age of 20
Yes, my dear, you've seen plenty
Now set sail cos you can't fail
At the tender age of twenty
When you're over twenty-one
You don't admit to what you've done
Or they'll try to stop your fun
When you're over twenty-one.
When you're over fifty
You forget to count
You ask people to guess your age
But deduct a small amount.
When your child has a baby
Birthday cycles starts once more
You're still far ahead because
You have seen it all before.
This poem on ages took me ages
So I wrote it in slow stages.
-ends-
Copyright Angela Lansbury Sat 4 April 2023
To be published in a forthcoming book of collected comic poems.
You can also read these paperback books by Angela Lansbury
Writing Poetry For Fun
Includes poem examples to inspire you, for anniversaries, birthdays, trades and professions, Valentine's Day.
Example Excerpts
If you need someone
Who's good at spelling
I need someone
Who's good at selling.
A Hairdresser gives you a cut
He chops it off, no ifs or buts
I.D. 3182338
***
Poetry Workshop Workbook
This handy book is entertaining and educational. It starts with quotations by poets about poetry. It ends with a poet's dictionary giving the structural patterns for poems such as ballads, sonnets, villanelles, and example of each and exercise.
From Lulu.com ID 2228624
Free look inside Grief and Us anthology on Amazon in which Angela has a chapter
A to Z of alliteration. Each letter of the alphabet has adjectives, names, places and more suggestions for titles for articles, books and businesses.
Look inside to see the amusing introduction on alliterative placenames around the world.
Please share links to your favourite posts.
I look at myself in the mirror
What do I think of that?
I think I am thin and beautiful
Why does the mirror say that I'm fat?
Reflections in the pool, Singapore. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright. March 2023.
I exercise while the day's still cool
I swim to get slimmer
I look at reflections in the pool
Kind tall trees wave, and weave and glimmer
I'm reflecting on the reflections
It's something new to do
Never mind, forget introspection
It's a lovely world for me and you
Why does the water reflect blue sky?
I read but I forget
Keep reading, one day I'll remember
Sadly. I haven't remembered yet
Someone stops to talk, reflects my mood
He's a cheerful neighbour
I reflect all interaction's good
Despite mad chats and weird behaviour
I reflect the time for swimming's past
I've stopped swimming, just float
I reflect I'm ready for my breakfast
Solid, secure, thoughtless, like a boat.
-ends-
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Where can we begin? Tell the sinners, no sin
Call a dripping tap - a waterfall
Tell the fat ones, no lie, they're looking thin
Speak well of all, tell the small ones they're tall
Tell all the frowners how you love their smile
Note in September, swear you remember
You'll find they smile in a little while
Send named Christmas cards, early December
How does a photographer make guys smile?
Think of favourite food, I think of cake
Keep awards on your walls, photos in files
That's how I smile 'though I've made a mistake
If you can't find a good words for the bad dead
The mourners a mixture of angry and glum
Praise loving, forgiving parents instead
Say, see silver linings in each act done
When you've done your best, but failed every test
When thoughts headed north - but the words headed south
When you tried to speak well, but only spoke ill
Mistaken, badly taken, foot in mouth
When you say sorry, they're not forgiving
They say, 'Sorry's too late, wrong words are gone,'
Don't give up, mate, your life's still worth living
They're still cross? Their loss - it's time to move on
Everyone fell when they were a child
Some got the blame when they were good
Most were or knew teens who went wild
Some, sometimes failed, or feared we would.
Find somebody new, who hasn't a clue
Pretend you are older, wiser and know
As for each fall, you've seen them all
Just listen, nod, eye roll, laugh, smile, and glow
Never complain and never explain
The folk in old folks homes don't know your name
Your old boss gets Alzheimer's, he'll soon forget
The world's full of youngsters you've not yet met
When you are old, darling, if truth be told
Shrug, forget bad things said, by friends long dead
Old enemies greet you like long lost friends
The few left - so glad to meet you again!.
-ends-
copyright Angela Lansbury 2023 March 27th
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Angela Lansbury's books and chapters in anthologies are on Amazon and Lulu.com
Look for Angela Lansbury poet, Angela Lansbury travel writer, and my photo. Books include Poetry Workbook. Improve your English. How to be the Best Man. Grief and Us.
Has Anyone Seen My Simile
Comic Poem number 170 by
Angela Lansbury
Has anyone seen my sweet simile 10
Moved or stolen my magic metaphor
My brain is oozing with choc'late ideas
I'll phone you a feast, a buffet, much more
A poem is like a cake baked with words
Rhymes like layers of cream attract keen eyes
Strong syllables beat like background music
Big birthday cards, show photos of french fries
The thoughts fly like postcards sent from the past
The chorus chirps like the crickets at night
Verses sweep on like relentless rivers
Like an orchestra's notes lead left and right
Wash hands, erase old, dirty emotions
Drape yourself clean and pristine in new clothes
Ready to face the world dressed in best thoughts
Phone friends, sing on balconies, from smart shows
Like boys meets girls, like large perfumed flowers
Like ballerinas spin spiral scarf twirls
Like eating meat stews sniffed and stirred for hours
Renewed, dance fast, cross the stage of the world
As paper notes float down for a good cause
As children giggle and old folk chortle
As the chorus line curtsies for applause
Writer, reader, hearer, feel immortal.
-ends-
Copyright Angela Lansbury
Please bookmark, follow, comment, and share links to posts with friends and family.
Angela Lansbury's books and chapters in anthologies are on Amazon and Lulu.com
Look for Angela Lansbury poet, Angela Lansbury travel writer, and my photo. Books include Poetry Workbook. Improve your English. How to be the Best Man. Grief and Us.
The Accident (Comic Poem 169) by Angela Lansbury
Have you heard the true story of
The car, the tree, and faultless me
It's true, you know it's not a game
The tree's always the one to blame
And when I back into a wall
It never is my fault at all
How does my husband always know
It's my fault 'cos I drove too slow?
Whatever can go wrong, go wrong,
Will do so, do so, do so. So?
Accidents repeat like a song,
Please learn from Robins on crew so
Why can't 'health and safety' predict?
Brains do that. It makes you feel sick,
Why are they, you, and me, so thick?
Be solid bricks, not a thrown brick.
-ends-
Angela Lansbury
Author's comment. In the last line I have used the word brick in two senses, firstly like a brick through a window, breaks things, the second a brick being the reliable person.
I changed Robinson Crusoe into an imagined typo or predictive text.
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Wild Otters Seen in Singapore
Comic Poem 168
By Angela
Lansbury
[10:30,
26/03/2023] Angela Lansbury BA Hons:
The otters
came to eat pond fish
All three
of them, a family
Large fish,
carp, are a tasty dish
‘Chase them
off!’ “Rather you than me!’
The guards
ran up, they shouted loud,
The otters
scarper, we're a crowd,
A dead fish
thrown into a bin
Pristine,
curved eye - and fanned out fin?
But stiff, still,
with a gaping mouth?
‘Don't eat
it, it will make you ill !’
‘What’s to
be done? High barriers?
Tough love
- big otter carriers!’
Although
our link with nature’s lost
‘We must
think of safety, of health
The condo must
count costs, what’s lost
Consider
all, not just oneself.’
‘No matter
what we did, or saw
Call the Otter
Society
Today hang
back, obey the law
Let them
act - with propriety
‘Block the
canal, their route, but do
Let raging
water filter through …’
Then we
won't see, another night,
Such charm,
delight, and fright, excite.
Copyright
Angela Lansbury
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