Food and Drink - what I think comic poem 402 by Angela Lansbury

A show which offers food and drink

Promises to be fun and good

You'll guess, like you, I'd not not say no

To fine food and free drink free flow

\

Favourite foods from Italy

Panettone, sure to please

Huge green olives, salami

First the chocolates, then the cheese

.....

Too soon, reluctantly, we go

Shared a hailed taxi from the show

For we'd more, serious, tasting to do

Valpolicella at London Cru

Sat there, I sampled several wines

Don't fall down on the floor, I pray

I sipped and spit in the spitoon

After, food, and sparkling rosé\

That day I'd sipped, spit, forty drinks

Smiled when they asked, "What do you think?'

The trouble was, my first thought,

Was what I need now's forty winks.

-ends-

Photo of London Vru, By Angela Lansbury.

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Who Am I And Who Are You? comic poem number 377 by Angela Lansbury

Big Hotel Bedroom, Campanile Hotel, Montpellier, France.

Where am I? In a hotel!

I thought I knew this pillow well

Which city, region? I can't tell

I'm in heaven, or five star hell.

 I woke up puzzled in the dawn

Faced my first question of the morn

The questions is, am I still me?

Am I the person I'd like to be?

Angela Lansbury in the mirror. Photo by Trevor Sharot. Copyright.

I see my mirror then my face

I look round the familiar place

Yes, everything's where it sould be

I'm glad to see that I'm still me

My soul's not swapped and gone away

I'll stay me all night and day

I'm satisfied with all I see

It's reasssuring I'm still me

I haven't changed my height or hair

Though I can change the clothes I wear

In dreams my mind had wandered free

Now in daylight it's back with me

I'm older than I'd like to be

And shorter than I'd like to be

Not as thin as I'd like to be

Yet, on the whole, I like being me

I'm not in some house down the road

I haven't turned into a toad

And though my troubles are a load

My books show me how much I knowed

And I am glad you're still the same

Although sometimes we forget names

I hope you won't hold me to blame

But you'll be pleased to see I'm me

I've got my marbles, got my brain

Yes, everything still looks the same

No Alzheimer's, no claims of fame

I'm not Napoleon, I'm me

I may not answer very fast

But all mistakes are in the past

Forgive and start again, at last

I'm sure you're glad with what you see

I'm sure you're glad that I'm still me

And almost all I used to be

And you are you, we're stuck like glue

Don't set me free, I'm glad we're we

We are we, and parents, too

When adding up, I'll think of you

And analyse statistically

Count a child, that makes us three..

So all in all, no more to do

Although the night is now a blur

The surroundings are what they were

Let's sleep, or act, not just infer.

As antidote to tragedy

I add a dose of comedy

To sum it up, as you can see

I'm happy to wake up as me.

Now here's a phase which you can say

To keep you happy all the day

I'm happy to wake up as me

I'm very happy to be me!

-ends-

My original version ended I'm vry happy to be me. The first version was a cheery and plebeian affirmation. I have changed that to, I'm happy to wake up as me. It's more orignal. However, if you think the earlier version is easier to say, and a more relevant affirmation to everybody's day, for me and you to keep thinking and repeating to ourselves. Why not add both as a couplet, like a Shakespearean sonnet. 

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So now you see the final version..

Positive Thinking - poem 171

Where can we begin? Tell the sinners, no sin 

Call a dripping tap - a waterfall

Tell the fat ones, no lie, they're looking thin

Speak well of all, tell the small ones they're tall

Tell all the frowners how you love their smile

Note in September, swear you remember

You'll find they smile in a little while

Send named Christmas cards, early December

How does a photographer make guys smile?

Think of favourite food, I think of cake

Keep awards on your walls, photos in files

That's how I smile 'though I've  made a mistake

If you can't find a good words for the bad dead

The mourners a mixture of angry and glum

Praise loving, forgiving parents instead

Say, see silver linings in each act done

When you've done your best, but failed every test

When thoughts headed north - but the words headed south

When you tried to speak well, but only spoke ill

Mistaken, badly taken, foot in mouth

When you say sorry, they're not forgiving

They say, 'Sorry's too late, wrong words are gone,'

Don't give up, mate, your life's still worth living

They're still cross? Their loss - it's time to move on

Everyone fell when they were a child

Some got the blame when they were good

Most were or knew teens who went wild

Some, sometimes failed, or feared we would.

Find somebody new, who hasn't a clue

Pretend you are older, wiser and know

As for each fall, you've seen them all

Just listen, nod, eye roll, laugh, smile, and glow

Never complain and never explain

The folk in old folks homes don't know your name

Your old boss gets Alzheimer's, he'll soon forget

The world's full of youngsters you've not yet met

When you are old, darling, if truth be told

Shrug, forget bad things said, by friends long dead

Old enemies greet you like long lost friends

The few left - so glad to meet you again!.

-ends-

copyright Angela Lansbury 2023 March 27th

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Angela Lansbury's books and chapters in anthologies are on Amazon and Lulu.com

Look for Angela Lansbury poet, Angela Lansbury travel writer, and my photo. Books include Poetry Workbook. Improve your English. How to be the Best Man. Grief and Us.

At The Wedding - A Parent's View

My goodness - they have filled the room

With exes of the bride and groom

I've got a lot that I could say 

But they would wish I'd stayed away

I could say that she's been around

I could say he's hard to tie down

I could say, I really worry

I could ask them, what's the hurry?

I could say, yes, she is a dear

You should have married her last year

I could have asked, what took so long?

Those ons and offs!  Now, what went wrong?

They won't let me give a speech

At top table we're out of reach

Our chief job is to sit and smile

Not tell the bride to run a mile

I sat and read the seating list

I've noted all the good  friends missed

But out of that small, happy crowd

When they said their vows, who laughed so loud?

 I saw the tall, wheelchairs, the small, 

The old, the young, the thin, the fat, 

That girl who wore the biggest  hat, 

The usher with no tie, nor hat 

They say our son is quite a catch

They don't say my hat doesn't match

It's what it is, not what it ain't

Because the room's too hot - I faint

I sit down. But soon recover

Looking pale like a grandmother

Our minister, we'd two, now one

Just carries on until he's done

We've donned finest hats and dresses

For two hours forget all stresses

A voice declared them man and wife

In other words, you're stuck for life

We're off to lunch to eat our fill

Just pay the bill, son, change your will

You two are now hitched up for life

Politely called a man and wife

The best man, who should be on guard

To stop a fight, is trying hard

Best man's a Dad and looking thin,

 His girl's had five - they live in sin

Thee best man wore a funny hat

He stood up, his first joke fell flat 

He hints secrets he'll never tell

Unless he's drunk - let's wish them well!

The groom is swaying, too, I think

He must have had too much to drink

He's lots to hide from his new bride. 

Her parents, and exes beside 

I've got so much I want to say

I'll leave it till another day

I won't tell them all that I know

I'll never say, I told you so.

She chose to forsake all other

Mother, father, sister, brother

He never heeded our advice

Although we told him once, then twice

Once married, he will quickly find

His wife will want to change his mind

On everything he thought was right

What he buys and does, dawn 'til night

Yet she will think the same is true

Once being wed's no longer new

Though two can live as cheap as one

To overspend's now twice the fun

I'm not sure which one's the winner

Just McDonalds making dinner

I'm sure they'll muddle through somehow

Best news - it's not our problem now.

Photos show us in our glory

That picture tells half the story

The photos show how glad I feel

Her lot, like ours, not down at heel

There's no cost for simply bedding

But you need cash for a wedding

The newly-weds to work must set

To pay off all their wedding debt

I hope their marriage lasts a year

So I'll retire and disappear

We've a spare room, with junk, at home

If they want me, I'll Answerphone

Being a mother was quite tough

But I've survived hurdles and rough

I've done enough. But I can't quit -

They'll soon demand I babysit!

A wedding proves what we all know

All that can go wrong will do so

I hope that you'll give me applause

Was our wedding like yours - or worse than yours?

-ends-

Angela Lansbury Nov 15 2020

Poetry Revision Notes

The first draft improved after i made every line eight syllables

I made each verse end with a surprise

I changed 'and one or two others beside' to the more specific 

Her parents, and exes, beside

I changed

Two can get twice as little done

Alternative endings:

Our wedding was the same as yours

Was our wedding the same as yours?

About the Author

Angela Lansbury is the author of 20 books, 10 by traditional publishers, ten self-published through Lulu.com the print on demand system.

Angela's books include:

Poetry Workbook - A handy book for yourself or a friend who is a poet, adult or schoolchild. The poems are amusing and there's a handy guide to all the formats, such as the two main styles of sonnet, the numbers of syllables in haiku, villanelles and so on.

In addition to other posts on this blog, please bookmark and share linkes with your colleagues and friends and family to the two  most written and most read of my other 20 blogs:

travelwtihangelalansbury.blogspot.com

dressofthedayangela.blogspot.com