Money, more or less. Comical poem 735 by Angela Lansbury.

 

I wonder where my money goes

I'm careful when I buy new clothes

On ebay, sales, and discount stores

I find a bargain, then buy more

It's the same when buying meat

Spend less, but still one has to eat

Here's the answer to life's riddle

Some will fiddle, some shop in Lidl

Chocolates, everyone knows

Can be bought from good old Marks

A little luxury from Waitrose

Sequinned clothes, and Prosecco sparks.

-ends-

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About Angela Lansbury - my books of poetry

Poetry Pets & Pests

Angela's Alarming Animal poems

Poetry Workbook

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A Full Meal comical poem 566 by Angela Lansbury

 How should we start breakfast, lunch - or dinner?

With an olive or a glass of sherry

With brown bread and butter, or still water

Prosecco's fun, but it doesn't matter

Water or alcohol adds lubrication

Relaxes the mind and starts conversation

What is the best thing to talk about?

Thoughts which cause passion but don't make you shout

I like salad and fruit, something that's fresh

Something surprising in ev'ry great dish

Different colours, some vitamin C

Some A, and D, lots of variety

Some potatoes or bread, meat or fish

Something substantial in the main dish

I think of dessert but have to wait

For pudding, petits four, chocolate (cake)

I was on a diet but I'm not a fool 

In the short-term we're kind, though long-term we're cruel

Resisting it all cannot be done

Why stick to one when we're having such fun?

Last, espresso coffee, maybe mint tea

Something refreshing, I think you'll agree

Ginger and flavours you know I adore

Offer seconds, thirds, 'til guests gasp, 'No more!'

-ends-

Drink More comic poem 418 by Angela Lansbury

Angela drinking mango lassi. Photo by Trevor Sharot. Copyright.

 I think I need another drink

The drink I need's not what you think

I need drinks of sparkling water

That's the drink which I need after

I see the room of jollity

Where most are drinking more than me

What kind of company they keep!

That much wine would put me to sleep!

I see groups, serious drinkers

Expert tasters, genned up thnkers

They swirl, take notes and then they spit

Don't look like they like it a bit

But even when I merely sip

Soon no armomas meet my nose

I must admit I wriggle toes\\

Spill water on my shrimking clothes

I see teens full of  loud laughter,

Sharing some jokes, they shout and scream.

Someone says, dear, you've had enough

They're such a killjoy, so it seems

I think I know what I must do

Make a quick dash towards the loo

And then return to drink some more

Some more of what I liked before.

I like a drink full of bubbles

A sparkling wine to pop all troubles

Prosecco, cava or Champagne

Whatever it was, I'll have it again.

-ends-

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What Keats Would Say Today comic poem 372 by Angela Lansbury

In anticipation of Burns night, inspired by A Facebook group, Mary's Law of English Rhyme.  I wrote this:

Angela Lansbury

Around the world groups greet new year

Briefly give last year's wins review

Reunion with friends old and new

Resolve what we and teams should do

Aultd lang syne's sung worldwide by all

'though we don't understand the words

We link arms, unless Covid calls

Sing, reading phones, repeat what's heard

Drive home on our old winding road 

"Police!" Drivers don't dare to drink 

Although a drop of warm whisky

Might help him talk and laugh and think 

Bounce over potholes, brave the bumps

They teach it's time for us to slow

Our party is with us right here

Wherever we may ride and go

We wait until we reach our home 

Where, law abiding as I am

At last together and alone 

I pour prosecoo, your wee dram  

 

I sink on my soft, sofa bed

My foam pillow's in silk, clean, deep

"Good night, my love, now you rest well,

Forget bad news, think sheep, and sleep."

Old love is like a long dead rose

Like a favourite comfy boot

But like a gnarled black winter tree

In spring it brings grandchildren, fruit.

My thoughts run races through my head

Before the nobile's  morning bleep  

I smile and chat with folks long dead

Then wake refreshed from drunken sleep.

-ends- 

Copyright Angela Lansbury. You may quote a couplet (two lines), which is fair use, providing you attribute the words to the author and provide a link to the original. 

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Note for poetry purists and the curious> When I wrote, 'Sing reading phones', I meant reading the words from phones. I was thinking of being at the last night of Writers Summer School when we sing Auld Lang Syne out of season.  Presentation and slide were words too long tor the line so I changed it to reading off a mobile phone. The unintended secodn meaning could be that people are reading whatsapp messages on their phones instead of singing Auld Lang Syne because they cannot understand the words and got distracted when looking for the words.

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