Cutlery And Kitchen Troubles comical poem 743 by Angela Lansbury

Mismatched cutlery. Photo by Angela Lsnsbury. Copyright.

 If only knives and forks could talk

And say I'm here each time they walk

I carefully buy complete sets

But where I've put them I forget

The saucepans pile up on the floor

Until we can't reach cupboard doors

We both agree we don't need more

He loses lids, and then buys more!

And then we lose the toaster tongs

The bread is stuck, the meal's gone wrong

The toast is cold, I'm getting old

I wish food would do what it's told

We finish clearing, washing up

Too late I find my favourite cup

Why home cook? There's so much to do!

It tastes good, and makes us feel new.

-ends-

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The Best Bed comical poem number 742 by Angela Lansbury

 I sink into my lovely bed

Soft pillows welcome tired head

The firm mattress gives me support

Where I promote constructive thoughts

Here I can stretch, wiggle my toes

Rotate my head, and rub my nose

My desk and chair it must be said

Are great but can't compete with bed

One day you're born, sick, well, or dead

Meanwhile, enjoy breakfast in bed

A new mattress, but keep the frame

So your old bed will look the same

Sort out ideas, plan new schemes

With confidence realise dreams

Electric blankets off and on

Night clothes worn, seams torn, colours run 

Are sheets designed to cause a fight?

Pulled to the left and then the right

Although tucked in with all your might

Refuse to stay fixed all the night

Electric levers raise the foot

I lift my legs and exercise

One day we'll do it with AI

By voice, I hope no seeing eye 

The bedroom door can open wide

Or hide the precious things inside

The window, curtains, dress on door

Bookshelf, lampshade, shoes, carpet floor

The duvet warm where you can hide

The naughty thoughts you keep inside

A refuge for coughs, from the cold

Haven for young couples, and old

A place to lay small girls or boys

Hug mum then snuggle with soft toys

Enjoy deep sleep then leap refreshed

To see day, dress and be your best.

-ends-

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