Saturday, August 30, 2025

A Spider's Web comical poem by Angela Lansbury

What is the best spider catcher

A glass with stiff card below

I've a spider catcher with a sliding panel

And a hoover works well, but few know 


We can never catch all the spiders

That is the big surprise

I'm sure that ten more are born

Each time one of them dies


A spider's web, one spider?

There must be a tribe

On the bathroom ceiling

The car mirror, and many more besides


When you see those trailing strands

Littering your house

You can guiltlessly dispose of them

In the bin with the abondoned wasps' nest 

And the short-lived dead mouse


The web which is worth keeping

Is the one which looks like crochet

Better than your woven blanket

It catches the spider's dish of the day


You have to take sides

The spider or the fly

It's a bit like watching tennis

One will win, the other die


I dont mind at all

So long as the spider's very small

It's got such a pretty house of doom

Better than racing round the room.


I could waste half the day

Spraying, and reading cans of spray

Smart spiders wait 'til I'm in bed

Then, unseen, weave their pretty webs instead.

-ends-



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