Deception Rejection, Recollection, Selection comical poem 627 by Angela Lansbury

 

Diary 2025 photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright. 

What goes into my diary

Is all chosen by me.

I can note dentists, doctors, bills.

Or jokes and joys and thoughts and thrills.

Some say life's a river, some say life's a stream

Some say all's for a reason, others, there's no scheme

Some say it's all conspiracy

Words hide half of what they mean

Everybody has at least one story to tell

Thoughtful wise ones of all ages

Divide life into fixed stages

But say the best revenge is living well

Dramatise the ups and downs

Into scenes with frowns and clowns

Keep the story spnning round and round

Everywhere delights of days and nights are found

The bad, the sad, the mad, the glad

The boy and girl, the mum and dad

The older and the younger, the enemy and friend

Choose your last words, make your happy end.

-ends-

Copyright Angela Lansbury. 2025. July 26th.

Please share links to your favourite poems.

Big Thread, Small Needle comic poem number 363 by Angela Lansbury

 Somewhere in far off China

There's a factory with a beadle

Whose job is to defend

The man who makes sewing needles

Those litle sewing needles

With the tiny eye

Too small for anyone to thread

God alone knows why

One day I'll write a letter

Explaining my complaint

Or maybe I'll do better

In person with poisoned paint

I'll shout and rant, in English

Make holes big enough for thread!

Chase him with sewing scissors

Until one of us is dead.

I think I'll write to someone

About the Nobel prize

It should go to someone

Who makes needles with big eyes

Maybe we'll run all day

Maybe we'll run all night

Or another twenty years

Until we prove who's right.

And I'll go down in history

As pioneering, wise

The courageous sewer

Who fought for bigger eyes.

Maybe I made a mistake

Disregard what I said

Another's worse, or equally bad

Blame the maker of the thread

But I should end positive

Sewers please take heed, all

Who should win the nobel prize

The make of the self-threading needle

Self threading needle. Photo by Angela Lansbury

It solves all the problems

It sets the world to right

I found one, lost in my sewing box

My day's now filled with delight.

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite poem.

Coconuts Make You Nuts comic poem 225 by Angela Lansbury

Coconuts. Photo from Wikipedia.

Down by the cool blue swimming pool

The water's cool and I am cool

The trees provide a welcome shade

After my swim, sit in the glade

The unformed guide soon comes out

His job is walk about and shout

Not like a bride, more like a groom

With a brisk broom sweeping in each room

Maybe, 'cause he's always working

He sees me swim,  thinks I'm shirking

It's exercise, I tell no lies

Yes, a 'work out' must mean working

Coconuts under palms at Cashew Heights condominium Singapore. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

 On trees coconuts are yellow

The Guard warns me, they'll soon mellow

Watch out, too late when they turn brown

For one by one they'll fall down

You never should sit underneath

Because one day you'll come to grief

I am too old to die, and wise

To accidents of any size

I am wary, sit here, sit there

This place, that place, this chair, that chair

My bed is where I'd like to die

That is why I'm coconut shy.

-ends-

Copyright Angela Lansbury September 14th 2023.

To help any foreign language speakers, the last line is a pun on a Coconut Shy, which is a game at a fairground where you throw a ball to hit a coconut off its support and win it.

Please share links to your favourite poems