Don't be afraid of long menus
Or young waiters, arrive early
Ask for their help, make them feel good
They'll smile, chat, show teeth pearly
To those used to using chopsticks
Knives and forks are confusing cutlery
Everyday layouts won't confuse the Brits
But silver service is a mystery
Each country has its own good rule
But it needs communication
To diners and new waiters
To avoid lots of confusion
Let's talk about a knife and fork
The knife is on the right
The fork is on the left
The soup spoon's first, far right
Why is the knife on the right?
Easy to understand
Before forks were invented
Knives were gripped by your cutting, (fighting!) hand
Soup Course And Plate
The British eat warming soup first
(The Chinese eat soup last)
Soup spilt in laps mishaps the worst
Tilt plate away, danger is passed
Knife & Fork Position
You start from the outside.
Placed A-shape on plates is silent talk
Still eating, paused, might finish soon.
Next, the soup spoon and the tea spoon
Soup Spoons
A dessert spoon's large and oval
A soup spoon's deep and round
For both clear broth and thick soup
Don't slurp but sip without a sound
Spoon sizes
Yes, the English soup spoon's bowl is round
In Europe that's unknown
Dessert spoon oval, tea spoon small
Coffee spoon smaller, should be shown
The serving waiter's on diner's right
Another's clearing from the left
All silently, like ghosts out of sight
Waiting at distance, watching, deft
When you finish in England
Knife and fork together, upwards, on the plate
Silently says, 'Waiter, clear now
We do not wish to wait!'
A chocolate comes with the bill
We hope that bill won't break our banks
Waiters smile, lead to the door
'Please come again,' bow, smiling thanks.
-ends-
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