Half the world is mad
The other half is bad
I'm looking for a sane friend
It's hopeless. I'm momentarily sad
Sev'ral decades before my time
Mad, smart women's fight won the vote
Some think black cats rule, ruin days
What's superstition's antidote?
The streets are full of people who
Wear masks and scarves and funny hats
Religious, football, uniforms
Need ten outfits to join all that
Party politics divides them
Plus the graffiti on the wall
If my only friends were those who're sane
I'd have no friends at all
I understand teenagers
Who want to raise their voice
But I have to be quiet
I do not have a choice
I have friends of all religions
And skins of every hue
And every kind of politics
And superstitions too
Some think that God spoke to them
Some believe in the big bang
Some think home school, and no rules
Others that insulters should hang
Some won't eat pig, some won't eat beef
Some won't eat lamb, some won't eat meat,
No fish, raw fish, no milk, no eggs
Be gluten free, no sugar, what's left to eat?
As for me, today's thoughts
Keep quiet is what life's taught
Hunters, don't show what you've caught
Or all your friendships come to naught
An theist, agnostic, or a humanist
A left wing, right wing, woke or communist
If I told my friends they are wrong
I'd never be kissed and never missed
So if you want to know what I believe
I believe there is no need
For me to stir the water
Upset your transgender daughter
And if I have a special diet
I shall try to keep quiet
Yet some things have gone the other way
I can say I'm dying and sick today
I can't fly the flag of my nation
But can mention menstruation
I don't know where this debate will end
But hope to keep all my batty friends
If I'd known my husband was a rocker
But next weekend was a mod
I'd have had tears, not fifty years
With one who won't believe in God
Because people who at first seem sane
Are secretly mad, but I don't complain
For though it drives me up the wall
If I stuck to the sane, I'd have no friends at all.
-ends-
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