If today were my last day
What would the nosy neighbours say?
'Look at that dress - look at that mess
We're all so glad she's gone away
'The dirty bins are overflowing
Strangling the flowers, weeds are growing
The bin men - they refused to call
So we're not sorry at all!'
That's why today I empty the bin
If someone calls, I can let them in
I've labelled keys to all the doors
Washed dishes, swept and hoovered floors
No worried thoughts entered my head
My only thought was, make the bed
All day I knew where I was heading
To make the bed with fresh, clean bedding
So if the Lord carries me away
I'm sure of what neighbours will say
A tidy house, an emptied bin!
That's why she would not let us in!
And when I'm gone, for days you'll see
The centipedes race round in glee
The weeds in triumph climb the bin
Until another soul moves in.
A lost gravestone, it ought to say
The way she lived 'til her last day
She wiped the dust, removed the rust
She's gone to some clean place we trust
She was a very careful soul
Did not have many issues
She would not want us crying
And throwing dirty tissues
We heard the noisy ambulance bell
Taking her off to heaven or hell
Ensuring she would not be late
For her date at the holy gate
Where every lazy woman and man
Lets her make heaven spic and span
We'll honour her, who passed away
And cleaned the house on her last day.
-ends-
I was wondering how many poems and posts I had written. I presumed on https://comicpoemsbynutter.blogspot.com/2022/02/if-today-were-my-last-day.htmloe poem per post and no post without a poem. I started numbering at the earliest date. After three, I was already tired. Then it struck me that the statistics page tells you how many posts you have written. today, Feb 18, 2022, the system tells me I have written 120 posts. That is more than enough for a book.
When I have time I could go back and add the numbers. That is a quick way to identify poems. For example, to say that poem 1 has the same subject, dusting and cleaning, as poem 120.
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