Saturday, August 31, 2024

Security comic poem number 465 by Angela Lansbury


 Suitcases. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

Whever you go

Wherever you are

Secure your suitcase

But also the car


A suitcase in a car

I must say

Is not safe when

Your car's towed away


You can sew a zip

Inside your pocket

But that's no use

If they take the whole jacket


So buyer beware

The thief doesn't care

He's not like Snnta

With goodies to share


If the thief is arrested

He's bailed and then

He's back at the station

Stealing again


So buyer beware

Traveller beware

Don't say no-one warned you

My dears, please take care


It isn't enough

Just to stay alive

Make sure that your chattels

Also surive


When you have travelled

To so many places

With fond memories

Of kind, smiling faces


Never confidently leave

Your bags all alone

Be glad to arrive

With your bags safe at home


Now you know what you should

And you shouldn't do

I don't know all of you

But I care about you


I hope you will heed

The words that I say

And have a safe

Barricaded, happy holiday.

-ends-

Friday, August 30, 2024

What Shall I Wear? Dreamy Dress, Dreamy Hair comic poem number 464 by Angela Lansbury

 What's shall I wear?

I'll comb my hair

I'll ask my spouse

They do not care



I'll wear a hat

Look good in that

Take off my glasses

No blind as a bat



Fake fur like a cat

Ask strangers, chat

Do I look fat?

They do not want to answer that



I'll have to diet

On the quiet

What do I weigh

I dare not say



Surprising what

Mirrors don't show

What only I

And my unerwear know


What am I saving this silk dress for

Who can remember what I wore

They can't even be sure

If we've ever met before


What Shall I wear

I'll wsh my hair

Dress for an imaginary

Milionaire - or billionaire


Sometimes you are dressed up in dreams

But the world's not what it seems

Your clothes are splitting at the seams

And the president is wearing jeans


In dreams I am dressed like a queen

My clothes are not vintage has-been

My wardrobe's like theaatre scenes

Each dress has pockets full of dreams.

-ends-


Monday, August 26, 2024

Givers and Takers comic poem number 463... by Angel Lanssbury


Angela Lansbury at a Toastmasters International meeting as Project Evaluator. Copyright Angela Lansbury.
 

Some people are givers

Some people are takers

Some people are builders

Some people are breakers


Some good people are like me

Some good people are like you

Some  puzzled ask us what to do

Some certain tell us what to do


Though some are smart and some are fools

They all can follow simple rules

To save their money and build wealth

To exercise and guard their health


Some people are fixed from age three

Others are late developers

The world is full of different kinds

When in need, look for kind helpers


Some people nod, 'Wise words are nice ,'

Others shout, 'Don't give me advice!'

It looks good to help out strangers

Never put yourself in dangers


When old fok and places have gone

Make time to mourn, but then move on

Find the best which you can preserve

Give out praise to those who deserve


There's time for work so do not shirk

There's sme for fun and time for play

Use each hour of every day

And always put your toys away


A place for all, all in its place

And put a smile on every face

When no friends are in the room

Contact colleagues and friends on Zoom


Don't moan if you must work from home

If you must, then do what you must

To avoid Covid and the flu

Choose protection which you can trust


You can wear shorts, flip flops or silk

Any time, drink coffee oor tea

Select full cream, order skimmed milk 

Wine, water, your choice, you are free

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite posts

Memories of My Friend Kim poem 462

A writer's chair. Drawing by Angela Lansbury. Copyrright.
 

I looked for Kim

Happy Kim

Kim who I'd be glad to greet

Kim whom I'd been glad to meet


She wasn't there

An empty chair

If she wan't here

Then why? Then where?


When we first met

I can't forget

She was seated in a crowd

A happy group luaghing loud


I smiled at her, she smiled at me

I walked towards her joyfully

Alas, I could not see a seat

Nowhere to drink, nor talk nor eat


The others shurgged

I felt unloved

She moved, so sweet

So I could have a vacant seat


Next day I rushed

For breakfast in the dining room

I saw her table, I was crushed

A man declared, 'No room! No room!'


She and I were conspirators

 So, when we were able

We both sat at the same, cosy 

Small, round, supposedly full table


Was there a space?

Someone said, .'No!'

I stood,  perplexed

Prepared to go

I'd say goodbye

And what do next?


An empty chair

Yes, there was, no surpise

Kim gave a smile

A slight, slight, nod

She rolled her eyes


I thought I'd sit, 

And so, I sat

So Kim and I 

Could have a chat


I said, loudly 'When your friend

Comes back, I'll move,'

I played that game

Their missing friend? She never came!


This year I looked

Kim wasn't there

A mutual friend

I found an empty chair


I spoke politely to her friend

And then, at last, gave him a stare

I asked, 'And Kim

Please tell me, dear

Where is Kim, why's she not here?'


He paused, cleared his throat

Breathed in, and sighed

'You didn't know?

Last year she died


'She had cancer, yes, far too young

You didn't know?

I suppose, when it's your time

You have to go.'


I could not spoil, his day, his holiday 

If he knew more, he didn't want to say

 I could not spend more time upsetting him

He stared at the floor. I said no more


I cannot find her photograph

Yet see her smile

And hear her laugh

She was tall and she was slim


Nobody else had heard of Kim

So I'm bereft

Now she has left

I do not want to spoil my day

Nor yours

Yet she won't go away


And so instead

Censor my head

Search constantly for her photograph

For in my head an ever fading photograph

I still recall her smile and laugh


When the slightest sad thoughts begin

I overlay my thoughts of Kim

With glad memories I can't forget

The joy, the welcome, when we met


The way she cunningly 

Found me my place

With raised eyebrows, 

A cynic, friend's face


And so I smile as I think,

Of conspirators, a nudge, a wink

A happy person, tall and thin

My happy memory of Kim.

-ends.

Written in memory of Kim Byles at Swanwick writers Summer School at the Hayes Conference centre, Derbyshire, met annually between 2014 and 2023. Died of cancer. Into farming. Wrote a novel, never publsihed. Created a play which was performed by a group. Had a writing buddy in SW England, in Devon or Cornwall. If anybody has a photo of her, I would like to have it.

Very poignant. Despite my efforts to end on a happy note, this poem makes me cry, reading it aloud.

I asked on Facebook if anybody knew any more. Geof contacted me and gave me her family name. I found an obit and some lobvely pictures of her looking happy. I feel much better now. The picture of her on the hay bale is so jolly.

She died Dec 23rd 2023.  Husband Ross. She wwas born in 1956 and died aged 67. About ten years younger than I am.

https://funeral-notices.co.uk/notice/byles/5164792


https://kimbyles.muchloved.com/Gallery/Pictures#image-gallery-1

It may seem odd to honour her with a poem loaded onto my comic poetry site. But her obituary asked for mourners to wear cheerful colours. Humour helps us cope with lifes downs as well as augmenting the ups. 

The picture below shows her laughing atride a hay bale. I wonder if that was on her family's farm.

She was a fun person.


She had arched eyes and looked straight at you.


One thing arresting about Kim, was the way she looked straight at you. She also asked you about yourself. A very engaging personality.


Geoff Parkes sent these


Kim Byles far left. At Swanwick Writers' summer school.  


Kim and her husband. Photo by Geoff Parkes.


Kim's writing room. By the outdoor swimming pool.


-ends-

Please share links to your favourite posts

Saturday, August 24, 2024

Left and Right Shoes - Choose comic poem 461 by Angela Lansbury

Now left or right

Which do you choose

First from the box

Two neutral socks


Then on the floor

Far from the door

I found my shoes

But got the blues



Two red sandals

They looked a match

Alas there was

An awrful catch


I found I did

Not have a pair

But two left shoes

I could not wear


That was something

Which did annoy

I looked again

And, oh, what joy!


Another pair of 

Two right shoes

It dis not take 

Me long to choose


I'm now wearing

One matchd pair

No longer fear

Of others' stare 


I must have bought

Two pairs in red

They found their freinds

Beside my bed


One moment's stress

I'm in a mess

A small effort

Joy of successs!


After I'd had

A little think

I matched them up

With each strap link


I'm very proud

Of what I've done

And hope that you

Enjoyed the fun.

-ends


Please share links to your favourite posts

Tuesday, August 20, 2024

UK Mail Box Toppers and times comic poem 460 by Angela Lansbury



The red  post box has a colourful hat

Amazing!

What d'you think of that?


On many London street's itts done

Each season or event, another one

The public said that it was fun


We follow them along the way

Nonsense and skill brighten our day.

-ends- 

Mail box topper in crochet or knitting. August 2024. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

 Useful Websites

https://personal.help.royalmail.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/135/~/royal-mails-postbox-network---your-questions-answered#:~:text=This%20means%20the%20mail%20collection,than%207am%20on%20a%20Saturday.

Saturday, August 17, 2024

My Name Is Angela Lansbury 459


Angela Lansbury, the author, photograph by Trevor Sharot. Copyright.


My name is Angela Lansbury

But there's more than one of me

The famous actress did more publicity

I shouldn't complain, because it's free


However, there is some confusion

My books and hers are on the same page

The websites are under some delusion

I'm mainly an author but rarely on stage


People seem surprised that there are two

Some still don't know, some never knew

On LinkedIn I once found thirteen

John Browns know what I feel and mean


In Wales a common names is Jones

I'm sure more than one Tom is known

So many Tailors, some called Liz

Some Mrs, some misses, and some called Miz


In France girls are Marie, in India Patel

Easy to remember, but a phone book hell

As for Mohammed, I must refrain

From exclaiming, what an unusual name


As for the horror of being just a number

In Singapore Lees must give numbered ID

Otherwise your lottery ticket

Might go to another in your family


All day long I have to explain

Yes, that really is my name

Sometimes I think life would be more easy

If I had been named X Y Zee.

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite poems.

What Does A Cow Do? 458 A comical poem in praise of cows and poets, by Angela Lansbury

Cow puppet photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

 I bought a cow puppet to amuse you

To tell you what cows usually do

In England we speak English, cows say moo

Because that is what we claim all cows do


What do cows in empty fields do all day

They are not like bulls, all work no play

All bull's job is to meet and greet, meet cows

To make friends fast - make calves. I can't say how


A cow's job's not pull nor push nor lift

A cow gives all of us a special gift

On supermarket shelves many types seen

Semi-skimmed, whole, organic, Jersey cream


A cow just eats and eats, what an easy life

Listens to music, not a lot of strife

It's out in summer, shelters in a shed

Don't count sheep to fall asleep, count cows instead.


How do working farmers make their money?

They sell milk from cows. From bee hives have honey

Some folk don't eat meat, but still love to eat

What can they do? Eat greens and say boo to you.


Silk worms eat mulberry trees make silk

From green grass the contented cows make milk

That's what insects and animals can make

What of us? Poems are what we create.

-ends- 

Please share links to your favourite poems.



Friday, August 16, 2024

The Smiling Sky poem comical poem 457 by Angela Lansbury

Smile toy. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.


Goodbye, goodbye

Look after yourself

Goodbye, goodbye

Look after your health


Until next year

Please write to me

All being well

Drive carefully


The sky is blue

Blue, blue blue

The clouds are white, 

White, white white


The clouds are light

Light, light light

A lorry's on my right

Right, right


The clouds float, 

Float, float, float

Light as a boat

Boat, boat, boat


While driving on the road

Road, road

I have a heavy suitcase load

Load, load


I have to keep awake somehow

And make sure I'm still in the now

So that in a little while

I'm safe home to smile, smile, smile.


The trees and signs and miles fly by

I think of home, my mood is high 

I'm feeling happy, don't know why

Give credit to the smiling sky.

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite poems.

Sunday, August 11, 2024

Machines Challenge For The Housewife and Holidaymaker comic poem 456 by Angela Lansbury

 I work hard, I lead such a busy life

Don't insult me, I'm not just a housewife

The dustpan hides, but no machine's meaner

Than my huge, heavy, clumsy, noisy, vacuum cleaner

Vacuum cleaner controls. Picture by Angela Lansbury. Copyriht


It's twelve extensions stay a mystery

Three years struggle - deserves a PhD


I bravely turn the old waste disposal

Good. It works. Then I turn it off again

But it continues whirring. Whirring. No!

To God, then Google, I complain - explain!


I turn it on and off. Heat and loud noise

No luck I tut. I hear metallic cough

I don't want a new one, although it's old

Non-stops a fire risk. Silence would be gold


Why pay more. It clears, peelings, smelling mess

Turning on and off again often's best

That's the engineer's secret, we confess

Process of elimination - success.

***

I don't want my life to be all work and no play

I don't want to stay, so I go on holiday, 

Wrong exit, drive miles, park, near tears, collapse

A kind man taps, 'Your phone has Google maps!'


In the conference centre I waste precious hours

This bathroom's designer never showers

People set off fire alarms, stayed dirty, scalded, grew old,

 Trying to decipher, the hot wheels from cold


I won't bore you more with battles with doors

The treats you like burglars, treats you like fools

You must find and press a hidden button,

You find it, turn it, slide it, push door, then pull


In the bedroom there's no bedside table, 

You must find your glasses when you're able

I don't like to complain, I don't want to be cruel

They've no table, spare chair, take a bar stool


Handy bibles, no sockets for your phone! 

Other guests frown, so you are not alone, 

A challenging week, you're too tired to speak

You've learned the system - it's time to go home.


-ends-

2024 Aug copyright Angela Lansbury


Please share links to your favourite poems.

Friday, August 9, 2024

Short Poem comical poem number 455 by Angela Lansbury

A short skit and a short skirt. Photo selfie by Angela Lansbury. Copyright..
 

Don't get caught

Keep it short

Don't bore friends

Have quick ends.


I know it's tough

One verse enough

But this is two

Sorry to you.


I hear you tut

And roll one eye

Now it's your turn

Give it a try.


See, those of us

Who are not tall

Proudly promote

All that is small.

-ends-

Copyright Angela Lansbury 2024 Friday Aug 9th

Please share links to your favourite posts. 

Tuesday, August 6, 2024

Bedtime Story - Home and Away Day Post 451b revision of comic poem 451 by Angela Lansbury

 Life's more fun when you're big, and three

Climb stairs, stand on chairs, feel at home

Open the top fridge on your own

You can reach strawberries for tea!


She likes to eat a blueberry

For breakfast, lunch, dinner and tea

She eats a stoned olive, takes two

Frowns, thinks of handing one to you


Her little shoes are on the floor

A pair beside the big front door

We ask her, 'Dear, whose are these shoes?

These pretty shoes, reds, pinks and blues?'


She picks up a shoe, she smiles and says

'This shoe is mine!' That shoe is mine!'

She opens the door. Weather's fine

Ready!. Let's go . Have a good time

 

Her favourite outing's a nearby park

She loves swings, ropes and the long slide

We leave to get home before it's dark

Then she sleeps on a short car ride (possible ending at bedtime!)


Little Ava has lots of friends

With birthday parties most weekends

But when she has a day that's free

She goes out with her family


She likes to eat with family

Sit on sofas to watch TV

Twice small Ava rode on a boat

Her life jacket can float, on sea

Child wearing life jacket. Photo from Sharot Family. Copyright.


 Little Ava has lots of friends

With birthday parties most weekends

But when she has a day that's free

She's out, or in, with family.

-ends-

Monday, August 5, 2024

How Are You? comic poem 454 by Angela Lansbury



 How are you?

Are you well?

If you're not

Please don't tell.


Do not say, 'I"m tired, and old,'

Do not say, 'too hot,' 'too cold'

Above all else, never say

I'm very busy. Go away.' 


I've got problems

Of my own

Be like me

Leave yours at home.


When a new boss

Asks, 'How do you do?'

Say, 'Very well, thank you, 

And how are you?'


Bow your head slightly and shake hands

Do like the others in this old land

Just remember, 'How do you do?'

'Very well, thank you, How are you?'

-ends-

Please share links to your favourite poems and posts. 

My books on Poetry and writing poetry are on Amazon,com

 and Lulu.com





Sunday, August 4, 2024

Look in a Book comic poem/song number 453 by Angela Lansbury

 

I look in a book and what do I see?

See the wide blue sky and a tall green tree 

There's a big red boat on a wide blue sea

And a big white sea gull looking at me


I look round the room and what do I see?

A gold box has a black key in the lock

The day has lots of long free hours to spend

This weekend's fun is playing with a friend


First let's open the toy box, my first task

Wait, how can I do it? Should I do it?

Who can I, should I, ask? What will we see?

I ask my friend, and we too agree


I often ask my mum, I can ask a dad

Tell me, please, how much good fun can be had?

Is it fine for me to open the box?

Can I, may I - open all of the locks?


What if everyone's working or busy?

I must wait but won't get in a tizzy

I can eat some fruit, I can have a drink

Orange fruit. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

I can look around, I can have a think


I could ask an uncle, auntie, teacher, 

Ask a family friend or a preacher

I could ask an adult, someone who's large

Ask the important person who's in charge.


I'm always delighted to hear them say

Yes, you can, and, you may, it's okay

Let's look in the box and find a big book

We look in the box and find a small book


 We look in a book and what do we see?

A wide blue sky and a tall green tree 

A big red boat and a wide blue sea

And a little red robin looking at me.

-ends-


Thursday, August 1, 2024

Ava Indoors, Outdoors Birthday Party comic poem number 452 by Angela Lansbury

 

Ava who's' three, has lots of friends

With birthday parties at weekends, 

When it's sunny and she's free

She goes for walks with her family.


When it's sunny and she's free

She goes for walks with her family.

When it's midweek she likes to cook

And when she'd done we read a book.


When it's midweek she likes to cook

And when she's done we read a book.

Ava's three, has lots of friends

With birthday parties at weekends


Ava, who's three, has lots of friends

With birthday parties at weekends

She wraps a present she can take

Thinks fish and chips, fruit, birthday cake


She wraps a present she can take

Thinks fish and chips, fruit, birthday cake

I'm happy cos we'll be there soon

Jugs of red drink, and pink balloons

Birthday Party Here Balloons. Photo Sharot family. Copyright.


I'm happy cos we'll be there soon

Jugs of red drink, big, gold balloons

Ava, who's three, has lots of friends

With birthday parties at weekends

Birthday Party cake. Photo Sharot family. Copyright.


Ava, who's three, has lots of friends

With birthday parties at weekends

But if there's one day when it rains

She always smiles, never complains


Yes, if there's one day when it rains

She always smiles,, never complains

When it's midweek she likes to cook

And when she's done we read this book.

-ends-.

Copyright Angela Lansbury.. Please do not share the poem but share the link back to this page. I intend to sell it as a book with illustrations.

Name Changes

For the customer, recipient of the book, or babysitter, the name can be changed to that of the child being  read to or receiving the book and reading it to a younger brother or sister.

For example

One Syllable Names

For one syllable names (such as Ann, James, John, change to Ann who is three.

Two Syllable Names

For two syllables, like Ava, Anna, Emma, Henry, Lucas, Mia, Noah, Peter, change to Ava's three, Anna's three, Peter's Three. Other two syllable names include, Ali, Mary, Christos, Richard, Johnny, Paris,, Rina, Tina, Sharon,  

Three Syllable names 

Three Syllable include, according to the list of top names in the USA in 2003, include (my alphabetical order, not popularity which was the order published),Elijah, Mateo, Oliver, Theodore, William, Evelyn, Sophia.

Four Syllables -

Four syllable names are mostly girls' names which add an a on the end, which include Amelia, Isabella, Olivia,  

Age Changes

The age can be changed to one, two, three, four, five, six, eight, nine, ten (or a word in another language in a bilingual home, such as French, un deux, trois, German ein, zwei, drei, Spanish dos, tres.

This is the first time I have tried my new rhyming scheme, repeating the last couplet of each verse as the opening of the next verse.

I shall do another version tomorrow, using the words biking and hiking.

For a family or child or culture without birthday parties, change the words to with the family or sees the family at weekends.

I though of changing and thinks there might be birthday cake, to 

'Thinks, sandwiches, fruit, birthday cake,' which sounds healthier, but m original version is easier for a 3 year old to say and understand.