It isn't much fun in a hospice or home
Where the health care visitor weighs twenty stone
Better than last year widowed, on your own
It's so good to know you're not alone
I'm always happy, though Monday's I'm angry
I ate all the chocolates but I'm still hungry
My socks don't match but I love my clothes
Who my visitor is, nobody knows
New friends swear, shout, sing, soon go mad
One cheese sandwich each day for lunch isn't bad
You remember your childhood like yesterday
But can't remember the month, week, or day
- Or whether you had breakfast today
Your sister tells you he is your brother
Your daughter's the one you thought was mother
They visit each day but soon go away
You've a half-star room costing five star bills
Every visitor wants you to re-write your will
Every fifteen minutes you take ten pills
A walk to the plant pot's your biggest thrill
One small drawer for all of your things
Somebody's stolen your plastic wedding ring
Two dresses and ten incontinence pads
A scarf for Sunday's music hall rag
Forty people, a birthday every weekend
Whisky glasses and birthday cake
As usual, the front door is locked
And half the staff have gone to a wake
Yesterday's enemy is today's friend
Yesterday's friend's chat drives us round the bend
Was it your birthday? What did I send?
I'm so happy, a great place, new start, a good end.
-ends-
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