Busy Dizzy Days comical poem 651 by Angela Lansbury

First I make a shopping list

Keen that nothing should be missed

On my way to do the shopping

In a hurry, can't be stopping

 First I pass the lush green grass

Pause. Put my nose near a red rose

Stop to take a photograph

Smile at new neighbours, wave, joke, laugh

Window shopping, what is new?

In the shops, read each label

Find a bargain, if I'm able

Patiently, join a long queue

Back at home, I'm a winner

Arrived just in time for dinner

But I'm asked, 'What went wrong?

Why did you take so long?'

Tramp Davies wrote, 'What is life if full of care

You have no time to stand and stare?'

That's the thought of shameless, aimless young

I'm old, less time, more to be done

Rush. Make sure each day's got lots of value in it

I do not want to waste a precious minute

Then when I stare, I sort useful thoughts

Of what I should do with bargains I've bought

Is there anything I might be needing?

Does the garden need seeds or weeding?

Do I need cover to protect my knees?

Should I plant herbs, which attract birds and bees?

Do I want to dig dirty potatoes?

Better stick to quick growing green and red tomatoes

Photograph, sunlight makes trees dappled -

'Let's go out and pick some ripe apples!'

Save leftover food for another day

Turn the excess apples into puree

Brief stop for snacking on what I like most

Cheese and butter melting on hot seed toast.

Cheese and toast with coffee. Photo by Angela Lansbury. Copyright.

***

Write, then. go out to enjoy today, 

Because tomorrow it might rain

Make another short list, start again

I'm busy writing, happy and don't need to explain.

-ends-

I changed 

then at last join a long queue 

to 

Patiently join a long queue.

The first version explains why I am late in the next verse.

The second version contrasts my dawdling with my husband's impatience to start dinner.

The toast (with mushrooms) was, in fact, breakfast. My picture shows toast with cheese for elevenses.

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. But my husband says, don't keep changing it. The flow is better with the first version.

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Censored Poems comical poem 545 by Angela Lansbury

I don't wish to hear a bad word

Which might invade my immune brain

'though I recognize all the bad words -

I do not want you to explain!

The problem is, I copy words

If I hear it once, I say it

I know you might find this absurd

When paid per word, yucks won't pay it. 

I do not wish to write a word

Which is vulgar, or slang or rude

'though nowadays it's often heard

One's status could be misconstrued

I've other ways to show my mood

Dictionaries give us lots of choice

Vinegar shouldn't drown brain food

Nor shouting show an icy voice

I admit words I deem taboo

Are scattered by the hoi polloi

A word acceptable to you

When used by me won't bring us joy

And so I censor all I write

'though passionate, no need to swear

I'd rather spread good news and light

Visions of angels with gold hair.

-ends-

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Illustration from wikimedia. Three wise monkeys.

What Other People Write About comical poem 543 by Angela Lansbury

What other people write about

On days when they cannot go out

Most children write of simple things

Bikes, scooters, not safe swimming rings

Of playing games and silly names

Of buses, cars and trains and planes

About goldfish, big cats, small dogs

Not giggly things like jumping frogs

Teenagers write about first love

A kiss and the blind moon above

Later they write about love lost

Of drugs and fast cars, not the cost

Whilst lying in their single bed

They dream of one they wish they'd wed.

Parents write of their baby's smiles

Not dripping taps nor laying tiles.

Old people, some like to complain

Although there's lots they should explain

Their youth which won't come back again

Claim their life's full of sun - or rain

Now, poets, what do poets write?

Of how they sat up half the night

And tried to put the world to right

Telling what other people write.

-ends-

Photo of Angela Lansbury with large pencil.

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Positive Thinking - poem 171

Where can we begin? Tell the sinners, no sin 

Call a dripping tap - a waterfall

Tell the fat ones, no lie, they're looking thin

Speak well of all, tell the small ones they're tall

Tell all the frowners how you love their smile

Note in September, swear you remember

You'll find they smile in a little while

Send named Christmas cards, early December

How does a photographer make guys smile?

Think of favourite food, I think of cake

Keep awards on your walls, photos in files

That's how I smile 'though I've  made a mistake

If you can't find a good words for the bad dead

The mourners a mixture of angry and glum

Praise loving, forgiving parents instead

Say, see silver linings in each act done

When you've done your best, but failed every test

When thoughts headed north - but the words headed south

When you tried to speak well, but only spoke ill

Mistaken, badly taken, foot in mouth

When you say sorry, they're not forgiving

They say, 'Sorry's too late, wrong words are gone,'

Don't give up, mate, your life's still worth living

They're still cross? Their loss - it's time to move on

Everyone fell when they were a child

Some got the blame when they were good

Most were or knew teens who went wild

Some, sometimes failed, or feared we would.

Find somebody new, who hasn't a clue

Pretend you are older, wiser and know

As for each fall, you've seen them all

Just listen, nod, eye roll, laugh, smile, and glow

Never complain and never explain

The folk in old folks homes don't know your name

Your old boss gets Alzheimer's, he'll soon forget

The world's full of youngsters you've not yet met

When you are old, darling, if truth be told

Shrug, forget bad things said, by friends long dead

Old enemies greet you like long lost friends

The few left - so glad to meet you again!.

-ends-

copyright Angela Lansbury 2023 March 27th

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Angela Lansbury's books and chapters in anthologies are on Amazon and Lulu.com

Look for Angela Lansbury poet, Angela Lansbury travel writer, and my photo. Books include Poetry Workbook. Improve your English. How to be the Best Man. Grief and Us.

Poetry Or Prose? Comic poem 166

 

In olden times we used to rhyme

And many careful hours were spent

To check the rhythm every time

Before our precious words were sent

So from the first glance you could tell

If your poet was quite unwell

If his rant, or hers, not its, meant

Help, call doctors, social workers

Undertaker, write sympathy

Because a real plea is in prose

But now, we're so confused, who knows

Like texting's terse, poems just verse

An unknown writer, overseas

Shocked all of us with heartfelt pleas

😟

'Modern life is

 killing me

Please save me 

from my enemies!'

Just texts without punctuation

Leaving anxious readers wondering

Should I phone friends - grammar police

Or welfare checks from real police?

After kind readers sent sympathy

'Explain, dear friend,' 'Come round for tea!'

A sharper cynic sent wise words:

'It's not a plea - just poetry.'

-ends-

Copyright Angela Lansbury 2023 March 20th

Photo of suicide prevention barriers on Golden Gate Bridge.

Poem: The person at the bus stop Comic poem 3

When you've no friends and family
Who want to listen or talk to you
You only have to call on me
I love to talk - and listen, too

Like most people, I'm one of the few
Whose words flow from me, fast and free
I'll gladly tell you what to do
So any time, just call on me

Sometimes you don't want to confess
To those who'll say, "Oh not again!"
"I said before ..." - "Don't give me stress!"
You don't want to depress your friend.

You need someone who's on your side
Explains the other's point of view
From whom you do not need to hide
Who nods, agrees, and says, "That's true!"

Strangers at a bus stop will nod
And smile, be glad, rush to agree
Reply to prayers, faster than God
And ask no more than company

If every stranger is my friend
Although we have short time to stay
Are sorry when our chat must end
But long recall who made our day

Now you know who will take your part
Who'll sit beside or will stand
For sometimes all you need's a heart
Handshakes more than a helping hand

So when your friends and family
Are gone away, then call on me
When you have need of company
I need you, just as you need me.
-ends-
Angela Lansbury, travel writer, English teacher, speaker.
Copyright Angela Lansbury Jan 31st 2016.

Readers : you are welcome to pass on a couplet or a whole verse of this poem providing you include me as the author and please refer back to this site for the reader to read the entire poem. Thank you. I hope you have enjoyed my poem.