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Affordable, Modern Twelve days of Christmas Parody
by Angela Lansbury
On the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love sent to me
12 Christmas crackers
Eleven pictures showing
Ten mince pies heating
Nine fruits a stewing
Eight cups of coffee
Seven stollen slices
Six little pancakes
Five doughnut rings
Four Christmas puds
Three French wines
Two hard boiled eggs
Toast and honey for tea with me.
Copyright Angela Lansbury December 22nd 2016
Author's note:
My draft version included:
Ten squirrels leaping
Nine couples dancing
Six big hard boiled eggs
Five pretty rings
Four singing birds
I just thought
For an audience which is not English, change it to
Four steaming puds (or puddings)
Alternative Lines
6
Six eggs for omelettes or
six little crumpets
3
I had three French songs instead of French hens
2
Two ringing bells I changed to two honey jars
Last
! tried to end with the last line reading:
a turkey and a plum tree
and plums for tea
I tried a Christmas tree
a cup of tea
some Yorkshire tea
Xmas Cake
And a Christmas cake just for me
And Christmas cake for our tea
And Christmas cake to share with me
Xmas Trees Or Secular Trees For Atheists?
And a Christmas tree?
And a tall spruce tree (More secular - but since Christmas in the title?)
How about an atheist's Christmas?
On the twelfth Day of December my lover/husband/ best friend/ an atheist (the rhyme to fit the music and copy the original wording in a familiar way has to stay as 'my' plus two syllables
The original Twelve Days of Christmas carol
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
A pink synthetic tree.
Happy Christmas to everyone
Angela Lansbury
PS
I typed this out as a poem with line breaks. However, the website has deleted the line breaks.
I shall have to devise a way of writing the poem in Word or Pages, photographing the page on a mobile phone, copying it into photos on a laptop and loading it up into my blog as a PDF picture. What a palaver!
Ah - I see what happened. I can click on Compose or HTML above. I must have clocked on HTML. I now have to learn the HTML code to insert line breaks. Meanwhile ...
Every year Grapedeal.com sends out a Christmas song parody using words relating to wine or wine bottles. See
grapdedeal.com
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